We mean the same thing, but express it differently. Emotional communication has its cost.
I've recently watched some debates and discussions, and it was horribly painful to realize that, in many cases, people are on the same wave length.
The problem is that many debates are emotional. They start to become this argument-driven thing that is only about being right, and proving that an opponent is wrong. In the process of that, simple arguments are being overheard, and the possibilities of understanding each other are becoming increasingly slim.
This got obvious when watching (some) political arguments: debates on gun violence, gender studies, racism. The truth is, in many cases, as a unrelated, unemotional third bystander, it was plain to see that both sides agree on many of the points, but got emotional about the other points that didn't match up, that's unproductive.
In life and work, this is exactly the same. Discussions can get heated, and all productivity is lost.
If you're looking on maximizing harmony, understanding and productivity in discussions, I'm convinced that you need to learn and teach how to bring a heated, emotional discussion to a rational and impersonal level again.
This will be what will enable us to make major strides in our development.